I noticed that there were certain people who seemed to have a closer relationship with Babaji. Gaura Devi, Lok Nath, Hurak Singh, Big John and a few more. They were doing practical things around Babaji and were spending more time with Him. I had seen that when evening aarti started some of these man were sitting in front of Babaji’s door meditating and when He came out walked with Him to the assan and stood by His side. That looked very interesting to me, they seemed closer with Him.
One day I noticed there was only one person sitting there and I thought this is my chance perhaps to move into that “circle “. I sat next to Hurak Singh and tried to meditate. When Babaji came out, we stood up. He spoke and joked a bit with Hurak Singh and looked at me but did not say or acknowledge me in anyway. We walked to His assan Hurak stood on one side and me on the other. It felt strange standing there looking at everybody sitting at Babaji’s feet singing kirtan instead of sitting amongst them on the other side. He looked over at me once or twice but that is all what happened that first day.
The next day it was same but at a certain point somebody gave Babaji a bag of toffees which He told me to distribute. He asked me also to get the cook to talk about the food. Even in the days after as some of these who were at this “position” returned, I stayed and activities increased and so did our interaction. It was only on practicalities in the beginning but it made me happy and feel a bit closer to this magical being who had stolen my heart. One evening after aarti when we, the ghana’s ( guards ) walked Babaji back to His room He took of His kurt a just before going thru His door and gave it to me. I was surprised and said I wash and give you tomorrow. He said No, this for you. Lok Nath started to explain that it was a blessing and that Babaji had just given me His silk kurta. Babaji took it from my hands and pointed at the small front pocket and said, here you make embroidery with Raghuvir Charan Chaudery. He said now you are a Chaudery.
Neelam from Germany made me a beautiful embroidery of this name and I sank deeper into India having gained an Indian family name.
At this point of my life I was not involved in but actually did not even know much about deep spiritual practices to reach some state or even think or desire something like liberation. I was purely in Love with Him. It was clearly beyond my own mind and understanding of anything I had ever experienced before or even could imagine such a “thing” existed. On the material level, receiving a toffee or apple from Him was already like receiving liberation for me. The teachings which I got sporadicly from Him seemed extremely basic but were the world to me and provoked happiness in me so big I did not know even existed. It was for most of us being around Him in this way then, like infants being around their loving father who gave unconditional love and attention to His kids.
That infant like innocence slowly wained after His Samadi and was in time replaced by ( the illusion of ?) responsibilities taking care of His ashrams, samaj & teachings. That innocence , this feeling of unconditional love is now a place inside I can visit in meditations and by being focussed on Him. This place is for everybody the same place inside and the same inexplicable thing which happens to devotees also arriving now and get infected with His love, if we are just open to receive it.
I never heard Babaji saying or even hinting about leaving ( Samadi ) or coming back to Herakhan. I did however hear Him talking about things which still until now have not materialised. For instance close to the bridge in Herakhan village he spend months with Nepali workers who were doing heavy work in making terraces there. When I asked once to Babaji what the plan was He said Making many rooms for people to stay. He also spoke about a big hotel at the Satikund with 108 rooms. Shri Muniraj also kept on constructing more and more with a plan in mind he never disclosed clearly. Babaji also spoke about darshan lines up to Barreilly etc All these things are indicating huge crowds coming to Herakhan. With the dwindling numbers visitors coming to His ashrams it does not seem so likely but if the Lord would adorn His assan again, all what we have and what is projected would soon be ……not enough.
It is clear to most of us that Shri Muniraj dedicated his life to Babaji with no reserves. When people asked him about Babaji’s return he would say; He is here, where did He go ? and until some 5/6 years back he did not entertain such questions. But then he said that Babaji was back in the body and would come back soon and made new kutirs for Him in Herakhan and Chiliyanoula. We are mostly all still battling with the daily affairs and keeping Herakhan & other ashrams, Samaj and hospital as good as we can and to keep what we have understood of HIS message going stimulated by the devotion we have for Him.
It was easier when Muniraj was inspiring our organisation and ashrams, hospital expansion and donations were happening in harmony. Just about everybody reading this knows that Babaji is alive in their hearts, feel Him when doing practice and sense His presence on great gatherings like Navaratry, Shivaratri or Guru Purnima etc.
It is time we grow up as Babaji’s devotees and take our responsibilities for having HIS light shining in our hearts. The world around is crumbling, just as He has told us it would. Crying about our misery and praying for His help does somehow not reflect His teachings and the time to act is now….or for some never who prefer talking about it and complaining about others.
Shri Alok Banerjee is now holding the chair but it would be wrong to expect the same from Him as we did from Shri Muniraj. He can only do this with us. Let us maintain and continue to prepare Babaji’s ashrams together for a future with HIM. Let us prepare our hearts for His return. With this wide and wild variety of characters, His devotees, those HE has chosen to come to His lotus feet it is such a challenge which can only be done with our hearts. That place inside of us where the lion and the goat drink from the same well, that place were the Divine resides in us. This will have the scent of the new world Babaji has spoken about, let us try to roll out the red carpet for the Lord.
Oshaar, Saab Dahan, Shri Shri Maha Prabhuji Patar he hain.
*** Phuro , Be Inspired ! ***